Shades of grey.

quote via creampuff.

Nothing is harder than it seems.

Bonnie and Clyde.

late night talks;

On Facing Death

"People imagine that they are not afraid of death when they think of it while they are in good health."

- Marcel Proust.

you have an aura

"I want people to feel an immediate happiness and cheerfulness when they are around me. To make a difference in someone's life. I want to make an impression in someone's life, so that even though I may be delicate and fragile, my footprints are permanent within the hearts of the ones I've touched."

via creampuff, again.

appearances deceive.

2 minutes into the conversation, his eyes filled with tears.
"Wo huo zai shi jie shang hen tong ku, mei you ban fa le."

Later my friend asked, "why did you talk to him?".
"Sometimes the best thing we can do is to listen."

fix your shattered bones.

if you only had one more day to live, what would you do?

something so contrived.

If you talk to me to make yourself feel better, then don't bother.

I like something that's easy and comfortable, smooth and fluffy like cotton candy.

talking in code.

Take this quiz to find out if u are girly or not! :D
below 40 = Not Girly
above 40 = Girlie
above 55 = Paris Hilton

[X] My fingernails/toenails are almost always painted.
[ ] During the summer pretty much the only shoes I wear are flip flops.
[X] My favorite toy as a child were barbies. (and I loved to dress them up and down.)
[ ] My favorite color is pink or purple.
[ ] I took dance.
[X] I love skirts/shorts.
[X] Shops at the mall.
[ ] Tight jeans are the only jeans Ill wear.
[X} I love chocolate. (DARK chocolate. oozing out of marshmellows.)

TOTAL SO FAR: 5

[X] I straighten my hair.
[X] I have at least 8 facebook pictures.
[X] I usually go shopping once a week. (disclaimer: ONLINE ONLINE EVERYDAY.)
[X] I love to hang out with friends.
[X] I have a real diamond ring or diamond necklace.
[ ] I've gone to a tanning salon.
[ ] I've gone to the beach to tan - not to swim
[X ] I have at least 10 pairs of shoes. (HAHAHA. is not that much.)
[X] I watch(ed) either The OC, Laguna Beach OR Desperate Housewives.
[ ] I change my profile weekly.
[X] I have worn a shower cap.

TOTAL SO FAR: 13

[X] I would NEVER step foot into Hot Topic.
[X] My cell phone might as well become a part of me.
[ ] I wear mascara everyday.
[X] I've been or am on a diet.
[ ] Bathing suits are adorable.
[ ] I don't know the difference between a sheep and a goat.
[ ] Tattoos are Gross.
[X] I have gotten my nails done.
[X] I own over 10 purses. (at last count my cupboard is bursting.)
[ ] MuchMusic is my one of my favorite channels.

TOTAL SO FAR: 18

[ ] I like to talk about boys.
[] I love to have other people do my hair.
[X] I like to give and receive hugs from all my friends.
[X] I hate bugs.
[ ] Carnivals are so fun!
[ ] Summer is THE best season.
[ ] My swimsuit has 2 pieces.
[ ] I'm waiting for my knight in shining armor.
[X] Musicians are hot.
[ ] You write me a poem and tell me I'm beautiful and I'm all yours.

TOTAL SO FAR: 21

[X] I'm self-conscious.
[] I cry often.
[ ] My room smells like vanilla.
[] My dishes get washed more then once a week.
[ ] I don't do sports
[ ] I HATE to run.
[ ] I squeal when I am surprised.
[X] I eat dried fruit as a snack.
[X] Has seen and read Twilight series.
[ ] Drew Barrymore is so cute.

TOTAL SO FAR: 23

[ ] I dance a lot.
[] I usually spend over an hour to get ready to leave my house.
[] My hair is important
[X] I love to get dressed up.
[ ] Every part of my outfit needs to match.
[] I talk on the phone at least once a day to my friends.
[ ] I'd love to have a photo shoot of myself.
[X] The price on clothes hardly matters. (depends on cost per wear, and potential mileage.)
[ ] I apply lipgloss 50 times a day.
[X] I wish I were a model. (cos of the height + you're paid to walk runways + you get to go to PARIS + MILAN + NY AMG.)

TOTAL SO FAR: 26

[ ] I wish I could meet Paris Hilton.
[ ] I wanted or have been something that was slutty on Halloween.
[ ] R&B is the best music.
[ ] I pop my collar.
[ ] Guys with Mohawks are GROSS!
[ ] Horses are beautiful.
[ ] I never pay attention in school.
[X ] Puppies are adorable.

TOTAL SO FAR: 27

[X ] I speak IM.
[ ] I would love to visit Hawaii
[ ] Valentine's day is so cute!
[ ] White is better than black.
[ ] I wouldn't be caught dead in all black.
[X] My closet is STOCK FULL of clothes. (i'm thinking of selling some away oh well.)
[] I HATE THE GRUNGE LOOK OF A BEARD.
[] I love flowers.

TOTAL SO FAR: 31

[X] I love to Doodle.
[ ] I love Celine Dion.
[ ] My baths are 2 hours long.
[ ] My wedding only needs a groom because it's already planned.
[ ] My friends and I are in a strict group. We mostly only hang out with each other.
[X] I like kids.
[] Diet drinks are the best.
[ ] I have been a vegetarian.
[ ] I refuse to eat at McDonald's.

TOTAL SO FAR: 33

[X] I check my facebook everyday.
[X] I have a lot of jewelry.
[ ] Only have gold jewelry.
[ ] My screen name[s] has x's in them.
[ ] Either one of my msn names has/had <3/♥'s in them.
[] I would never want to be the opposite sex.
[X] I have more than 3 pillows on my bed. (they are all piled up at one corner.)


TOTAL: 36

HAHAHA CLOSE ENOUGH. OKAY BYE.

/slinks back into bacteria induced revelry.

Waiting for a response.

#1: I love history, weirdly enough.
Like Greek mythology or Romance of the Three Kingdoms or even Irish folklore, I'll slurp it all up like good soup.
(I just spent like 45 minutes clicking here and there on Hercules and his exploits on WIKI. Then after that it went on to Jason and the Argonauts, and err Theseus and the Minotaur. You get my drift.)
On the other end of the spectrum, I do not find history of countries/nation states to be of any interest. The French Revolution did interest me because I read this book during that period that had some swapping person exploit carried out, and I thought to my 10 year old self, so cool.

#2: I love to read, rather voraciously indeed.
My reading appetite rivals my eating appetite, which says something. By read, I must qualify and say: absolutely no biographies or autobiographies or downfall of Russia etc etc kind, i.e. no non-fiction.
I used to love going to the Tampines Library when I was in primary school to sit and read by myself. Especially about Greek Mythology, and oh, there was the occasional Chinese book.
I'll take reading over watching a bad movie. Even if its reading a bad book, because thumbing through pages is very relaxing for me. Especially so if these pages happen to be new pages.
/grins to self.

#3: I love my iTunes library.
I refuse to listen to other people's iPods/iTouches/iPhones because they don't have the playlists that I like. And playlists are very important, because I don't listen to anything else in my iPod Classic. Mostly, its either the lonely hearts beat the same or alternate/parallel playlists.

#4: I have a set order in my FireFox routine.
This is how it goes:
- LJ friends page >> LJ friends page editorials >> LJ friends page friends
- Google reader (very important)
- Facebook
- Hotmail / Entourage if Hotmail doesn't work.
I must finish all four of these things before I can start shopping online / looking at other stuff. Which explains why I have not much time left on my hands after that.

#5: I love to eat.
Or I guess you could say I'm greedy, whatever works for you.
I just, love food! I think its great (:
Unfortunately, this spells bad things for areas of the body like:
- the thighs
- the tummy
- the butt
- the arms
and everywhere else that hasn't received a workout in like, 4 months.

#6: When I shop, the music that the shop plays, the way that the shop smells influences my buying decisions.
If the shop (looks at F21 at Vivo) plays really bad techno music, I will be like 'I need to get out of this place ASAP'.
If the shop has a really bad layout / consumer traffic flow, even if I really want to get something from the shop, I'll give it a miss, because I'm not the type of girl that squeezes with others to dig through, err stacks of plaid clothes for my size. I rather err, obssess over it online and decide.

#7: However, #6 doesn't hold water when I go thrifting. Because thrifting is special, and I feel special when I've got something I can wear for like $3.

#8: I have never found anything to buy at FEP / Bugis Village & have never bought anything from these 2 places. Just. Can't. Find. Even. Though. I. Want. To.

#9: I have poor psychomotor skills. Mostly this applies itself in situations like:
- trying to catch house keys thrown by Male Members in the Household. (my mom will just hand them to me)
- kill mosquitoes by sheer force exerted by both my hands. (end up slapping thin air.)

#10: When I am really earnest about studying, my couch and sidekick brown cupboard will get cleared of things on it, wiped down with a cloth and be shiny new happy clean. Then I can study. I did this yesterday, and now it is filled with one bag, and multiple clothing items. /fail

#11: When people are buying something from the same shop, and when I too, want to get something, I am more more moar moar tempted to get the item I want, than if no one were to get anything. This has been the de facto situation now, as opposed to my impulsive buying sprees a few years back. Not seeing the good this change has done, because the Paperchase outing today resulted in a happy me, and a sad bank account.

#12: I watch shows mainly for character development.
I want to follow where the character goes, and where I can too.
Explains why I watch Bones (for Booth & Brennan), Chuck (for Chuck & Sarah), Grey's (initially for Derek & Meredith, then for Izzie & Alex, which came like 3 seasons too late, now for Christina & Major Hunt. Also, Bailey!), Private Practice (for Addison, and associate cute guys).
And also why, I like SATC and not GG.

#13:Hard(er) to see under the exterior of frivolous, but yes, I'm not a girly girl. By girly girl I mean: more pragmatic than romantic... think in the same vein.

#14: I value style more than substance it seems. This only applies to: handphones and soccer teams.

#15: When something is going badly, I tend to ignore it in the hopes that it'll resuscitate itself and be better again. (Normally this does not happen), so am queen of escapism. I venture to say most of my bestfriends fall into my queendom of escapism. /eyes

#16: There are more photos related to fashion on my wall and in my phone. I like to keep nice pictures around me, they make me happy.

#17: I like to define things because it makes me feel safer. But I tend to exist in the gray areas rather than absolutes. Very contradictory, shrugs.
This applies to: compositions, literature texts, relationships etc.

#18: I need to expand space for my bags. They are crying out in oppression in my cupboard, all confined in 2 shelves. I frequently humanise my clothes / shoes / bags / food as you will realise. Sometimes, when I finally get to eat something I've craved for the longest time, I will say 'Hello! Ni Hao!' to the food. My brother frequently pokes fun at me, by saying HELLO NI HAO to his food. I fail to see how this works, but still give him a glare.

#19: (I'm reaching #25. I thought this day would never come.) I like to keep the end in sight, it makes me more focused. On the other hand, I'm learning that you don't need to know everything in the future. You can still not worry, you can still be at peace.

#20: I'm a picture person. I can remember the names of models; on GeoChallenge (FB GAME) I do better with the map parts; I visualize stuff better than say, numbers?

#21: I just put Love Remains The Same on repeat for like 20 times I think. Sometimes, its not just the lyrics of a song, its the cadence too. And the subtle riffs of the guitar and the way it peaks, just nicely.

#22: (I spy a mosquito and instantly turn on the fan.) I am adept with the scissors. You can hand me a piece of paper, and a pair of sharp scissors and I will churn out nicely strung together words with no markings beforehand. As I said, the visualizing thing really helps.

#23: I used to love to read manga! I still read occasionally, but in secondary school I used to read under my table during Higher Chinese lessons.

#24: I have a love-hate relationship with Damien Rice. I find some of his songs nice, but others too whiny.

#25: After hanging out with me for aperiod of time, the people around me, tend to use terms like HH, /beams, or come out with their own like HB (hao ba) and like, /hinthintwinkwinkblinkblinkclueclue. & they tend to abbreviate terms too. Like DGATFE (do good and turn from evil, eh sophie)

Ah this was so exhausting.

Note To Self.

when without inspiration, please look here

Love, me.